Remember That Time I Came Home With Bruises From Tootsie Rolls?
After my trip to the fair, I just couldn’t get enough small town life. To satisfy my next fix, my grandfather, sister, niece and I attended a parade in Tioga Pa. (For my non-local friends, I’m pretty sure about 212 people live in Tioga. They have no traffic lights, 1 gas station, 1 grocery store and some grass.)
We were told the parade was to begin at 6:00. The parade route was approximately 2/3 of a mile long, so I didn’t expect to be there past 6:15. Naturally we heard the first beats of the marching band at 6:35. They don’t really rush around these parts.
The highlights of the parade included:
- The floats/fire trucks/tractors/bands all came along approximately 5 minutes apart. This created a parade that lasted close to 90 minutes. The parade had 4 floats and 21 tractors.
- Those throwing candy chose to throw overhand. Also, there must be a surplus of tootsie rolls in Tioga because that’s the only kind of candy that seemed to be thrown. Maybe I should be glad. Jolly Ranchers coming at you at that speed could do some real damage.
- There was a group of adults behind us drinking a mystery beverage out of red plastic cups. That mystery beverage smelled a lot like that guy that harassed my friend and I at Dunkin’ Donuts. I had the urge to rack up the cups and start throwing ping pong balls.
- One of the four floats had somebody dressed as a giant beaver. [Insert your own giant beaver joke here.]